i bought a milk foamer from a company in Singapore but was unhappy with the cheap plastic materials and lack of provided batteries so i wrote an email to them and complained

hello!
human being?
yes,
human being,
hello!

look!
my hand
is free of
weapon, and
is not balled into
a small, though
still effective,
means of harm.
i see you are
doing the same—
thank you!
i feel
marginally
more safe.
say,
look at that!
an animal is
attached to
a length of
material!
you carry this
material in your
hand!

haha!

you are controlling
the movements of
this animal!
this animal,
tell me, human
being, this animal,
has it been
selectively bred
over thousands of
years to be small
in size
(cute!)
and largely without
any of its
once-robust
instincts?
yes!
it is cute!
look at it yip
and bark!
hahaha!
human being,
yes? yes,
ok, well,
weather!
what about that?
do you agree
with me
that there,
up above us,
is sky?
how about
the temperature,
does your skin
feel any?
i see the skin
of your arms
is bare,
no material
covering—me too!
i think we
can agree—there
is sky above
us! it is
“warm”
enough to allow
for a little bit of
nudity!
hey,
what about those
people who have
different opinions than
us?
yeah, they
sure are stupid!
did you see
the politician that
represents ideas that
we think are
different than ours?
ya!
they should be shot!

haha!

wow, people
are stupid
when they
don’t agree with
us! human
being? yes?
yes.
what region would
you say we
inhabit? yes,
we are near
the sea so
i also agree that
we are regionally
“coastal”. well,
how about boats?
do you sometimes
float?
wow!
what about
fish? can you
catch one?
oh,
a big one,
too?!

yes!

you should see
the images of me
holding dead fish—
fish that I myself
have killed!—
and very big!

ok,
well,
human being?
yes? yes,
ok, well
direct your animal
with your length of
material!
if it defecates,
please
put your naked hand
into a plastic bag
and pick up that
poop!
haha!
or, just kick
it into the tall
grass, no one will
know!
hahaha!
human being?
we are
safe? yes?
thank you,
yes!

Published by Zak

an intertidal island in an ocean of impermanence.

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