i say i care yet i just can’t seem to find the time

for a while it was
boats big enough
to live on.
it didn’t matter
their seaworthiness,
only if
they’d stay afloat
at a dock.
only if 
they’d allow
the sleeper to dream.
it was a
small area
in which to
rinse off,
though there’s a
public shower
in the parking lot.
it was refrigeration.
it was electricity.
12 volt, 120 volt, 30 amp.
it was the opulence of a room
with ceiling enough
for a body to stand
full upright.

then it was
bicycles,
bicycle bags,
ultralight sleeping pad
and tents.
it was gps units.
it was clothing
made of wool,
clothing to wear
repeatedly,
without the inhabitance
of stink.
it was maps
poured over,
it was routes
planned out.
it was message boards
and forums of people
sharing opinions;
best gear,
best camping sites,
best ways to keep
calorically full.

next it was
smaller boats,
open skiffs,
space enough only for
a stacked standing dead
cedar, cut
into rounds.
it was forty horsepower
engines.
it was just seaworthy enough
for short trips
to close bays.
eyes to the shore
keen on trees dead
for the taking,
close enough
for ease of hauling.
it was chainsaws.
it was bar lengths.
it was the idea
of warmth.
the wish
of useful activity.

never has it been
seen through
to completion.
always has it been
the sleeper,
hoping
to dream.